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The 5 principles of communication

Goal

Know the principles that are essential to practising good communication.

What is communication?

Communication is the essential vehicle for multi-professional exchanges and a permanent state of mind. It is not limited to words: it also comes through the absence of words, gestures and attitudes.

The 5 principlesIn one sentence
1. You cannot not communicateEven silence and inaction communicate.
2. Every communication has 2 aspectsThe content (the information) and the relationship (the bond).
3. There are 3 types of communicationVerbal, para-verbal and non-verbal.
4. Every communication is symmetrical or complementaryA relationship of equality or a high / low relationship.
5. Managing the communication spaceTerritoriality, proxemics and exchange zones.

1. You cannot not communicate

Communication is inseparable from behaviour. Since we cannot not behave, there is no such thing as "non-communication".

SILENCE

… is still communication.

INACTION

… is still a behaviour.

Key takeaway

Communication is permanent. Everything I do — or do not do — sends a message.


2. Every communication has 2 aspects

A message travels from a sender to a receiver, through a context, a vocabulary and a channel / medium.

SENDER  ──►  [ context · vocabulary · channel / medium ]  ──►  RECEIVER

Every communication therefore carries two inseparable aspects:

  • The content → the information being transmitted.
  • The relationship → the bond created between the people involved.

"Did my message get through?"

Between what we intend to say and what is actually perceived, part of the information is lost. The goal is to preserve the essentials despite this loss.

100%
80%
60%
40%
20%

Progressive loss of the message between the sender and the receiver.

The essential

What matters is not what is said, but what is perceived.

To check that the message got through, we rely on feedback (the return): it closes the loop and maintains the bond between the people involved.

"Can someone remind me…?" → asking for feedback is a way of making sure you were understood.


3. There are 3 types of communication

TypeWhat it isExamples
VerbalThe substance, the wordsSpeech, writing, wording, semantics and conventions
Para-verbalThe way it is saidVolume, rhythm, tone, silences, articulation and pronunciation
Non-verbalThe bodyGestures, postures, gaze, attitudes

The real weight of each channel

Contrary to intuition, words carry little weight compared with the voice and the body:

7%
38%
55%
Verbal
Para-verbal
Non-verbal
The para-verbal in detail

Volume · rhythm · tone · silences · articulation and pronunciation.


4. Every communication is symmetrical or complementary

The relationship between the people involved defines the type of exchange.

Symmetrical communication

A relationship of equality between the people involved (e.g. two colleagues of the same rank).

Complementary communication

A high / low relationship: one person is in a high position, the other in a low position (e.g. a front-desk exchange).


5. Managing the communication space

Three attitudes are possible depending on the context:

  • Deferential attitude — I step back and respect the setting.
  • Natural attitude — I stay myself, adapted to the situation.
  • Free attitude — I am relaxed, in my personal space.

This management of space rests on three notions:

Territoriality

Making a space YOUR OWN: the territorial space is expressed through an attitude and a behaviour that mark the appropriation of a place.

Proxemics

The physical distance we set with the other person carries meaning:

intimatepersonalsocialpublic
DistanceUse
IntimateClose relations, close contact
PersonalConversation between acquaintances
SocialProfessional / formal exchanges
PublicSpeaking in front of a group

Exchange zones

Depending on the posture adopted, the exchange shifts into one of these three zones:

Confrontation
Cooperation
Collaboration

In summary

  1. You cannot not communicate — silence and inaction speak too.
  2. Two aspects — the content and the relationship.
  3. Three types — verbal (7%), para-verbal (38%), non-verbal (55%).
  4. Symmetrical or complementary — equality or a high / low relationship.
  5. Manage the space — territoriality, proxemics, exchange zones.
The key phrase

What matters is not what is said, but what is perceived.